Delegation and Communication Rule the Day
Nick and I used to fight every night around 7p after the littlest of kids were sleeping because I'd be getting ready for the next day while Nick was ready to relax.
I felt overwhelmed by the duties of the house and I hated when Nick asked how he could help. I remember thinking and probably in many instances muttering under my breath, "Oh, you know. You can help me with EVERYTHING I DO EVERY NIGHT."
It was stupid. The fighting was petty. The exhaustion is/was/(will always be) real. We really just needed to figure out how to better communicate.
I figured out that if I could label each individual task that needed to be done every night or before hosting friends or before a parent visit, the playing field could be leveled. Nick wouldn't have to ask how he could help and I could give him the opportunity without having to have a conversation about all of our nightly to-dos.
With magnetic popsicle sticks, I can put each to-do on the fridge each afternoon and by the time bedtime rolls around, both Nick and I can tackle the tasks 'listed.'
Here's what it looks like in real life.
My husband, Nick, and I both wish we would've had more realistic expectations about what to expect after having kids. We knew sleep would probably be hard to come by but our expectations of our sex life after kids was naive at best. Sex just wasn’t a thing we thought would change all that much.
Wow were we wrong. We hope this two part series can make you laugh, let you know you’re not alone, and give you some tips on how to bring the PDA back to your bedroom.
*Disclaimer: This is an honest read from a happily married couple. This is not an article from a perfectly married couple. We, like everyone else who has committed their life to a partner, struggle with real, deep things. And if you’re related to us, please consider moving on to another blog post.